Magical Mystery Tour

Hello hello hello! Bet you weren’t expecting to read another one of these, were you? A lot has changed since the last time I wrote an entry on my website. I’m not going to detail EVERYTHING that has happened since…2016 was it?, but I will focus on a few key areas that seem the most relevant.

With the upcoming birth of our child in June, I have been feeling more and more compelled to get back into the writing game. And now that I’m newly unemployed (surprise!), I can’t think of a better time to get started. My goal is to write at least one entry every month. That’s it. I may post more often on specific subjects at length, but at the very least, I’m committing to one post each month. So with that commitment in the world, let’s get started.

So what’s new with me, you ask? Well, in case you hadn’t heard, I reached the lofty 2015 goal I set of becoming a successful craft cocktail bartender. As with all big, time-intensive goals, this one was a sinuous, slithering, shapeshifter of a serpent to snatch. With every bartending job I acquired, I’d feel as though the end was within an arm’s length only to have it wriggle to the left, then to the right, then turn its venomous head toward me, threatening to strike. At times I felt discouraged by the whole pursuit; doubting the possibility of becoming a bartender at a reputable establishment AND making enough money for my family. There were many occasions when I entertained the idea of starting over in a new pursuit. I’ll admit, I may have even slightly considered the possibility of starting a Youtube channel… But alas! I persevered and I feel like I’m at a point where I can confidently say… I have both hands around that snake’s neck. In a non-sexual, totally professional way.

So where am I working now, you ask? Well, in case you hadn’t heard, I lost my jobs as of a week ago. Awkward. Let’s talk about what I was doing pre-coronavirus first and then move onto the present day quarantine quandary facing us all. My three main jobs were all in the food and beverage industry. I was the most tenured bartender at my favorite craft cocktail bar in Salt Lake City, Under Current. It’s a beautiful lounge-style bar, with exceptionally crafted, yet approachable, cocktails, and gourmet small plates, ranging from oysters and charcuterie boards all the way to Bahn mi sandwiches with fries. I loved it. I still love it and all of the people I used to see on a regular basis. Not just the customers either. I loved the camaraderie that existed amongst the entire bar staff. That was the first thing that got me interested in working there; seeing how the bar staff interacted with each other. It’s one thing to treat the customer well, which anyone can fake, but it’s entirely different when you can sense that all of the employees genuinely like each other. It’s a beautiful and rare thing to witness. In any business for that matter. It has been four years since Under Current has opened and I am the longest standing bartender. I’m not sure how we have managed to pass on this amazing culture to this new generation of employees, but that magic still exists behind the bar. We truly are a family that was artfully crafted in a manner that rivals our drink-making abilities. I can’t wait until we can all work together again…

Last summer I was introduced to another bartending opportunity in Park City. In fact, it was at Under Current of all places that I was solicited this opportunity. I was serving this group of extremely friendly and happy individuals and they told me I’d be a good fit at the hotel they all worked for: the Montage. I was initially skeptical as my first barbacking position was at High West Distillery in Park City. I hated the commute and told myself I’d never do that again; especially in the winter. As I kept talking with them about it though, they told me how much money they were making. I couldn’t believe my ears! During the winter, they were making 2-3 times as much as I was making at Under Current on a busy weekend night! Still skeptical, but intrigued, I went out on a limb and applied. After a grueling 14-day-make-minimum-wage-and-smile-about-it training, I was hired as their newest bartender at Burgers & Bourbon, one of the four restaurant concepts on site. Prior to getting hired, I did some research to see what I was getting myself into. I knew the Montage was an upscale hotel, but even after they hired me, I still felt blindsided by just how upscale a place can be. Montage Deer Valley is, how you say, the cream of the creme of the soufflé that is baked to perfection and fed to you gently, one small bite at a time. It is the epitome of luxury. The property sits nestled in the rolling hills of Deer Valley Ski resort. The views are breathtaking. Just imagine the hotel from Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining, expand it fourfold, and shove it into the top of a mountain. I bet my “office” view, beats your office view ;) 

At times I feel conflicted working there. The money is great, I enjoy the conversations and connection opportunities I have with the customers, but seeing all this wealth around me is discomforting. It feels…morally questionable. That’s the only way I know how to describe it. Of course, you are going to have your difficult customers (excuse me, we call them “guests” at ze Mooooonnnntaaaaage) and the work is incredibly difficult (the shifts range from 7-13 hours and you are on your feet the whole time), but there is a subtle malaise I sense while working there. Both from the guest-employee dynamic and the company culture. Not in a literal sense, of course, but it feels just as palpable, like detecting a cold in a coworker. Working at the Montage, there is a very clear separation of class: the affluent guest class and the working class. The purpose of the working class is to serve the guest class. These two classes only interact when necessary and relationships do not exist between classes. It’s taken me some time to adapt to this class disparity as it hangs in the face of equality that I have grown to value in society. I have no problem serving people (that’s my damn job as a bartender), but it feels different when you can tell that some of the people you are serving feel like you SHOULD be serving them. Reminds me of a few societies I’ve read about in history textbooks if you catch my drift…

I also get the sense that a lot of the associates working at Montage don’t necessarily like their jobs. To some extent, this makes sense: Montage Deer Valley takes advantage of the J1 Visa program and has a lot seasonal employees from all around the world: South Africa, Brazil, Slovenia, China. Not all of these employees care about their job outside of the time they will be there so why put in your full effort? But this doesn’t account for the sense of dis-ease among the salaried, permanent employees. A lot of them are overworked (I respect the hell out of the kitchen staff) and the customer base is extremely demanding, so it could be the case that a lot of them just feel burned out. Whatever the case, it’s disappointing to work with people who don’t care to be pleasant for one reason or another. I should mention, however, that this statement doesn’t apply to everyone. I’ve met a lot of really spectacular and talented and positive people who work there too, but as we are slowly learning, a company and society can only function so well in the midst of “sick” individuals.

As if two jobs wasn’t enough, I decided to add teaching cocktail classes to the “mix”. As of last August, I am officially the teacher/trainer for Lake Effect’s cocktail classes! It has been a very enlightening and rewarding experience so far. I’ve always had a notion that I would enjoy teaching in some capacity and it’s nice to finally affirm that gut feeling. I have taught three classes to date. I focus on a different aspect of cocktails and alcohol in general. Our first class focused on the history of cocktails and we made three different classic cocktails. In the second class, we learned about the fermentation and distillation process, then made an egg-white cocktail, the Pisco Sour, and a Manhattan variation. And at the last class, we just got drunk! Okay, we learned about the dark, dark history of gin, made some gin cocktails, and THEN got drunk. My next class was scheduled for March. We were going to explore Amari in detail; my favorite category of alcohol. I’m considering streaming a live cocktail class in April during this quarantine, just to keep them going. We will see!

But enough about cocktails…let’s talk about the elephant in the room…and by elephant I’m assuming you’re talking about the pregnancy Sophie and I are experiencing. And shame on you for using such a derogatory saying to describe her baby bump! 

THAT’S MY WIFE AND FUTURE CHILD YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT A***$$*#@!!!

We will be having a child in a few months. June 16 is the due date. It feels very surreal, but is getting very real with every passing day. In the last week, her belly is growing exponentially larger. Ok, not exponentially, but I am noticing a change in size every few days or so. I’m also noticing a change in her energy level. As she leaves the second trimester and enters into the third, her brief respite from nausea and newfound energy have devolved/evolved into hip aches, swollen extremities and belly bloating. I guess there’s no avoiding this period in the pregnancy…She has been a real trooper through it all though. I can tell she is actively trying to remain positive, get regular exercise and eat healthy. I feel very fortunate to be with such a strong and capable woman. At this point in time, we have opted not to find out if our child has a penis or a vagina. As such, our gender reveal party will be preluded by a symphony of screams, streamers of fluids, and a confetti of intense pressure. We do have names picked out though; mostly. If it’s a girl, we will (likely) name her E***** J******** and if it’s a boy, his name will either be S***** or J*****. (HINT: Try refreshing the page if you’re having trouble seeing the names. It won’t help, but it will be funny.)

I think I can speak for both of us when I say we are excited, nervous, and a slew of other conflicting emotions. Last month, which feels like a lifetime ago, we had the opportunity to go on a trip to Portland, OR with our dear friends Bryan and Camille and their 6 month old Graham. For those of you reading this in the future, a “trip” was an event that you planned where you would leave the safety of your quarantine zone and visit another location (eg a city, a country, another quarantine zone…it was totally up to you!). We spent the first few days enjoying the Oregon coast, playing board games and loosely making tsunami escape plans in case “the big one” shook us all loose, followed by a few wondrous days in the city, touristing like the greatest of tourists. It was the first time we really got to interact with Graham and it got me excited for fatherhood. It was a special moment, watching my childhood best friend taking care of his son. I felt very humbled to be where we were; not physically, but temporally. We have come so far and I am grateful to simultaneously take part and watch as our collective lives unfold…

I have more to write, but I think that’s a good way to end part one, don’t you? Part two will be available later this week and will include one subject that is very much on my mind: COVID-19 aka the BEAST aka m- m- m- myyyyyy Corona!  

Stay tuned (or don’t, it’s your life),

Michael